Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Cuckolding. Oh the tangled webs we weave!!

I know my next post was suppose to be on Spirituality and Femdom, but this topic I am speaking on today I feel is very important. It has come to my attention over the past few weeks that some men do not understand how to express to their wives their Cuckold desires. First, I want to make it perfectly clear that "cuckolding" was never something my slave asked me for. I took the knowledge I had of his other fetishes and then took MY OWN feelings on the subject and decided that this might be right for us. In order for a person to get past the fantasy portion of cuckolding and really get to it's purpose, you have to strip away all the fantasy that goes along with it. This part of Femdom is not very prevalent. I think I read where it only appealed to 5% of the whole Femdom population. I think I can understand why.

If you are a man and are going to your Wife with these thoughts of being a Cuckold, you have to understand how she will probably feel. I only give my opinion on how I would feel if my husband had come to me and expressed his desire to be a cuckold. First, I would have been hurt. I think any man that wants his Wife to be with another man in lacking in love for his Wife. I know I was a little upset when I first mentioned cuckolding to my husband and he did not react in jealousy. He was thinking about the fantasy, not the reality. It took me a while to make him understand that by him not being jealous, that I would want to be with other people, gave me the message he didn't love me. For why would someone who loves another person with all their hearts, not mind if that person was with another. I know I didn't like thinking about my husband with other women, so why would he not be upset that I was talking of being with other men (and women). Once I talked to him about my feelings and thoughts, he assured me that he didn't want me to go be with other people, it was the mental aspect of being so submissive to me that he would not leave me if I was to be with other people. Now that was something I could understand.

For me Cuckolding has absolutely nothing to do with anyone but the Domme and sub. The third person is strictly a tool, just like a chastity belt or rope is a tool. It is an object the Domme uses to help the submissive become more submissive to her. Not that I do not take into consideration the feelings of the third person, I do. I just make it clear to them that the main purpose of their being with me is to assist in making my sub more submissive. I will not be falling in love with then and leaving my husband for them. They will not become a slave to me. They are strictly a fun toy I will be playing with and putting back when I am done with it.

So, when I hear of men going to their wives and asking to be cuckolded or trying to get their wives to cuckold them by being bad lovers or whatnot, it will not work. It has to be the woman's idea to cuckold her slave and only for the purpose to make the bond between Femdom and slave stronger that I feel cuckolding would truly work. I am sure I will get comments of people telling me this is not so. Let me make this clear, this is how I feel about Cuckolding and Femdom. It is not law and I am not God. If you feel differently than great. But if you are a man trying to convince your Wife to cuckold you, you had better think long and hard about it. Make sure you have her understand that it is not that you do not love her, you do!! Think long and hard about if you are really ready to see the woman you love with another. The fantasy is wonderful. Thinking about it is fabulous. Actually doing it in real life is quite another. You had better be prepared for your Wife to either get upset or to possibly find someone else she would rather be with other than you. If you are forcing or trying to coerce a non-Femdom into cuckolding you are weaving down a slippery slope!

If you are really into Cuckold porn, realize that your Wife is not in the videos you are watching. It might turn you on to watch a bunch of performers act out cuckolding. It is much different in real life. Just please, be prepared and think long and hard about what you are asking for.

Thursday, May 22, 2008 Community Site is finally launched!!

Well it's official. The Lifestyle Community I have been working on is finally ready. It has been up and running for a few weeks now but I wanted to make sure I had most of the bugs worked out before I announced it's official launch. I am still in process of adding articles, stories, interviews, photo's, video clips and so on, but it is ready for you to come and begin participating. The site is totally free to join and it will stay that way. The community will offer various articles I have written, along with some other articles I come across online that are helpful to this lifestyle. There will be monthly (or bi-monthly) online classes and chats I put together to help learn about different aspects of living a Femdom lifestyle. I have added sections for Photo albums and Video Clips to be added by members. As a member, you will have your own personal blog, profile and the ability to add articles, stories, photos, videos and forum discussions. My hope is for this Community to become a much valued resource in learning what Lifestyle Femdom is and what it is not. It will be a place women and men can come and learn what this lifestyle is all about and how to incorporate it into their lives, if they so chose.

It won't be all work and no play though. Please come and start interacting and enjoying the different fun things I will be adding. I come across fun little programs, like one that calculates which days you may cum depending on how many times per month you are allowed. It is a great tool for a Femdom to have. I am also scouring the internet for other fun games and gadgets to lighten up something that far to many people take way to seriously. In the end, BDSM and Femdom are suppose to be FUN. Let's remember that little fact!!!

As always, I encourage feedback and suggestions. Let me know what you think and if you think something can be better, let me know. I have a suggestions box on the main page where any and all suggestions are welcome. You can also post comments to this post. So come on over and let's make this Community the best it can be. You can get to the Community by clicking here.